melanie-isms IV

Conversations overheard around the house:

Dave asked Melanie if she would ever go to Japan with him to see the Ice Festival.
"I don't know Dad, I don't know the culture or any language"
"Well, I know the language and I could help you"
"Actually, all I need to know is food, bathroom and boys, and I'd be good"

Rachel: Is the stove on? I feel something hot.
Melanie: Oh that's just me. It's been on since I was born.

Melanie: I'm like the Grand Canyon, and boys are like the Colorado River . . . they just naturally flow to me.

Texts from Melanie are always entertaining:

Text sent in the early morning to the other side of our house:
Me: are you up?
Melanie: Unfortunately. Don't feel good at all. Head hurts, feet feel raw, pinky infected, inside of mouth has been feeling scratched up lately, etc.
Me: I'm sorry, Maybe we can find some medicine to help you out before we leave this morning.
Melanie: What medicine can repair a broken heart? and raw feet?
Me: All you need is love (la la la la la)
Melanie: Could it beeee? I found somebody to love.
Me: sounds like you've caught a bug, (maybe a Beatle!)

I get texts like these regularly:

How do you spell garunteed? guarunteed? garunteid?
How do you spell "in-cell-a-tion" ????

roger roger 2-4
(um Mel, I think you mean 10-4)

Me: where are you?
Melanie: We're tanning on the roof. No flash photography please.

I sent Melanie into a store and I waited for her in the car. I got this text from her:
I have a wedgie I can't get 'cause there's cameras in here . . . .

Melanie borrowed my phone for a couple of hours, then I got this message when she returned it: uh, hey . . . if you get a text from a 928 number, can you tell the nice man to text me on my phone? :)

And these are my favorites from her:

Night pumpkin!

You're the bomb-diggity!