Sunday, March 6, 2011

probably t.m.i.

I was told the other day that my liver wasn't working quite right. I was questioned about alcohol consumption on the night before my blood work was done. I had to tell them I have no good stories to tell because I don't drink. Before the week was over, I was asked 3 more times about my drinking habits. I finally said - can you make a note in my medical file that I don't drink? Never have. Not ever. Not even once. She laughed and made a note on my file. The next day someone asked me if I drank any alcohol before my blood work was done. I asked, would you mind getting a highlighter and circling the note on my file about the fact that I have never touched alcohol in all of my living days? (is that so unusual?)
Anyway, I had to go get an ultrasound done so they could get a few snapshots of my insides. I was told to go fasting, but to drink 32 oz of water one hour before the test. I learned something about myself. I don't have a 32 oz bladder. I was kept in the waiting room for an additional 10 minutes and by the time the ultrasound started I had to have a conversation with the cute young ultrasound technician that we were about to have a medical emergency on our hands (well, maybe not a medical emergency, but a very real emergency nonetheless). He promised he would hurry. My definition of hurrying would be to quickly get the work done. His definition of hurrying entailed pressing directly on my bladder for extended periods of time. I don't think I have ever been in such a precarious predicament in all my adult life. He finally let me take a bathroom break before he inspected the rest of my innards. I had to ask him "when you were in grade school, did you ever dream that one day you would look at people's spleens?" He laughed and admitted that it never crossed his mind.
Apparently my spleen is in excellent condition. He said my liver looked fine too. That's good to know.

7 comments:

Bandanamom said...

I remember having an ultrasound when I was pregnant with Holden - they told me to drink 32 oz of water before coming to the hospital. By the time I was in the waiting room at the hospital I thought I was going to die! But I didn't say anything because I figured it was suppose to be incredibly uncomfortable. It turned out when they started the ultra sound the lab tech said "OH MY GOSH! You're going to have to go try to get rid of some of the fluid in your bladder! You're going to burst!" When you're pregnant and you're trying to rid yourself of just "some" of the fluid in your bladder, that's a whole other problem! Probably a little TMI also, but it was a memorable event.

Lauri said...

So what's the matter if your liver and spleen are perfectly healthy?

Terri said...

That was my question Laurie. Not ENOUGH information.

Cynthia said...

I don't know -- I have to go see a "specialist" later this week. Right now I'm just gathering some pictures . . .

jaust.me said...

I hope everything works out and is fine. I have always loved the way you tell a story. I'm not sure a story about liver problems is supposed to be funny. ;)

Cathy said...

Wow Cindy. they found parasites in me when I got asked a gizillion times about alcohol! How come you guys only had to do 32 oz.? I had to do 64oz.!
Hope they find a quick and easy problem and solution!

Cynthia said...

Oh Cathy, I would have burst at 33 ounces!